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Ouch, my bum!

To start this out… I’m a KLUTZ!

Let me tell you about my Wednesday morning. I was walking down the stairs to go to work. It was about 7:30. I was carrying a puppy, this way he couldn’t wander and piddle. Walking down the stairs, walking down the stairs, everyone in the house is sleeping, walking down the stairs. And just like you’d see in a cartoon, I fell. My feet came out from under me and I landed on my butt on a step (carpeted luckily), me head fell back and hit the edge of a step, and the puppy was airborne. I thought I was going to have a headache for the rest of the day. Nope. That went away. But I think I may have fractured my bum bone (the coccyx). It hurts. It’s hurts to sit, stand from sitting, squat, bend over, walk, well, you get the picture.

So, moral of the story, no matter how bubbly you think your bum is, if you fall on it just right no amount of padding is going to save you.

The end.

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Break me, oh God

I am broken. I feel like my life is in shambles and I’m spiraling out of control. I don’t know what’s wrong with me, which makes it even harder to deal with, because I don’t know what to “fix”. But what I do know is that piece by piece God is breaking my hard exterior shell.

I am thankful that God loves me enough that He wants to purify me, to conform me little by little into the likeness of His Son – gentle, broken, and humble before the His throne. I thank Him that He loves me enough to put me in the refiner’s fire, a fire that leaves me so exposed and vulnerable, yet a fire that cleanses and purifies me as well. The Holy Spirit is cleansing the sinfulness from my heart and molding me into the likeness of His precious Son. Sometimes blessing comes in the form of pain. Let me not waste my pain, but use it for His glory and for eternal purposes.

God break me. Take my all. Shake me from the core. Cut me down that I might rely solely on You. Lord, my heart remains in your hands, because I know that my life is but a vapor before Your throne. God, change me that I wholeheartedly follow your plans for my life. Transform me that I might think more like You. Grant me the grace to follow Your will and run with Your thoughts.

Often, it is in our weakness, not our strength, that God is glorified, and it is in our brokenness that we find healing. I need to humble myself and let God break me again and again, in order to shape and mold me. God, only You can truly break me and make me new. God, break me even more if it is to Your glory.

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Why do I take everything so personally? I seem to take everything that everyone does as a hit against me, then I go sit in a corner and cry (really it’s laying on my bed and crying). I didn’t get a job I applied, therefore I’m a failure. I didn’t get invited to go out with friends, therefore they hate me. A boy I have a crush on doesn’t like me back, therefore I’m unlovable. Guys in general seem to not find me attractive (at least no one pursues me), therefore I’m dually unlovable. Why is it so hard for me to accept things the way they are and not take them so personally against myself? Isn’t it enough that I am a child of God and that He loves and accepts for just the way I am?

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Emo or Angry?

I was curious what the difference was between emo and angry people. So I thought I’d do a little search online for some answers. Unfortunately, my search didn’t make it past Read the info below. If you know me, and you know how I’ve been acting lately, and you have some insight, please share.

“Emo is a somewhat ambiguous, controversial slang term most frequently used to describe a fashion or subculture which is usually defined to have roots in punk fashion and subculture, as well as some attributes of gothic fashion and subculture.

More specifically, “when referring to a person’s personality and attitude, most definitions of emo hold that an “emo person” is candid about their emotions, sensitive, shy, introverted, broken-hearted, glum, and often quiet. Emo personality is also often connected with writing poetry, which addresses confusion, depression, loneliness, and anger, all resulting from the world’s inability to understand the author. Emo poetry uses a combination of any of: a highly emotional tone, stream of consciousness writing, a simple (ABAB) or nonexistent rhyme scheme, references to the flesh, especially the heart, heavy use of dark or depressing adjectives, concern over the mutability of time and/or love, and disregard for punctuation, grammar, and/or spelling. Themes such as life is pain are common.

“Some definitions of emo hold that typical “emo persons” are likely to inflict self-injury, most often by means of cutting, burning, or otherwise mutilating themselves. Some assert that it is cool within the emo subulture to pretend to be suicidal and self-harm, or that participants self-harm purely for personal enjoyment.” (1)

“Anger is a common emotional (physiological and psychological) response to a perceived threat to self or important others, present, past, or future. The threat may appear to be real or imagined. Anger is often a response to the perception of threat due to a physical conflict, injustice, negligence, humiliation or betrayal among other contentions.

“The expression of anger can be through active or passive behaviors. In the case of “active” emotion the angry person “lashes out” verbally or physically at an intended target. When anger is a “passive” emotion it is characterized by silent sulking, passive-aggressive behavior (hostility) and tension.” (2)

So which category do I fall at this moment in time with recent emotionalism? I don’t think I’m either. Maybe I’m feeling out of odds with myself lately, but I don’t believe I’m angry. And I really don’t think I’m emo, I just wanted to compare the two.

(1) All emo information found at
(2) Angry information found at

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Tips! (and not monetary)

I get a daily e-mail from Daily Candy. And today they had a link to a website called Top Tips For Girls. Check it out, it’s a pretty cool website. Have you ever wondered How to Be Happy, How to Polish a Handbag, or How to Solve Bad Breath? Well, this site has tips that readers submit for all to read. I highly recommend bookmarking the page!

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